This is a musical preview of the song, Punkrocker, by the Teddy Bears, meant for an upcoming fly-girl video (that will appear probably next month). I finished this version last week, which is not an adult video. In fact, it's a kids video. Watch it and enjoy. You'll crack up, it's hilarious.

The video is 4 minutes long and 70mb in flash format, so click it and wait for it to load.

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Announcement: RantCentral is an excellent new blog site that is a sister site to migrogers, literally. It's severely leftward bending, hovering between flaxseed & fascism, and mostly concentrates on the political and social issues in the United States. If you're interested, check it out, and leave a comment. Unlike MigRogers, the blogger for RantCentral encourages comments and freedom of speech. Please check it out and spread the word.

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A brief update on the fate of journalist Roxana Saberi from last month. She was given an 8 year prison term, spent 4 months in an Iranian jail, and was released.

Meanwhile, two American journalists, Euna Lee & Laura Ling, are being held by the North Koreans and are scheduled for trial in a couple days on similar charges that Saberi faced. They'll probably be found guilty and sentenced to a couple years in a labour camp, but be released after a couple weeks. It's all just a big game. No harm done. Lee & Ling will get some rest, lose some weight, and come back to the US with tighter abs after eating nothing but rice and beans for the past several weeks. Hopefully they'll learn something about trying to project their way of life and ways of thinking on others. There's enough things to focus on here in the US than going halfway around the world and trying to tell someone else how to live their lives. Stick to plugging your opinions on The View and no one gets hurt. Journalism is a man's job anyway. Women should stick to cooking dinner, and wearing a lot of eye make-up so they look 'super-fine' in the passenger seat of their husband's sports car with the top down. And a sloppy blow job once a week wouldn't hurt.

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Yesterday an Air France jet with 216 passengers disappeared over the Atlantic. French President Nicolas Sarkozy said, "It's a tragic accident. The chances of finding survivors are tiny." Whoa Nelly, hold your horses there, Nicolai. Don't be so pessimistic. There's hope yet."
It's my understanding that an island exists (or doesn't) in the middle of the ocean that has an incredible magnetic pull (and magical properties) and I wouldn't be surprised the Air France airbus crash landed on that island and its passengers are drinking out of cocounut shells and chowing down with Joshua, Ben, Locke, Hurley & Sawyer, and the rest of the "others". The only problem I can imagine is that most of the Air France passengers speak only French or Spanish, so they'll have to communicate with the "others" via hand gestures and sub-titles. As luck would have it, they should be rescued in a few months anyway, and return to France, where they'll all turn into assassins with drinking problems and serious mental disorders, then find a way back to the island - where they feel safer - and discover, what?!, they're living in the 1970's and listening to music by Carly Simon and working on a time machine with the Dharma initiative. Following that mind-blowing realization, the first thought on their minds should be, "This is all cool as a summer in the Haight, but now I should really be thinking of a way off this island (again) and return to the mainland (and back to the present) so I get my dumb ass to the race track and put a huge bet down on Mine That Bird in the Kentucky Derby, who I already know will win the race at 50/1!" . I know that's what I would do.

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In other sad news, Kermit the Frog has reportedly died due to complications from Swine Flu. A private memorial service was held in Culver City last week. In lieu of flowers, his bitch, Miss Piggy, asks that you send your donations to the "Institute for Retired Muppets", most of whom are now muppet prostitutes, homeless muppet alcoholics, or trailer park dwellers cooking muppet meth.

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True story. I was in Starbucks yesterday and ordered a Venti decaf. This is how the conversation went down:
Me: "Hi, could I have a Venti decaf please-"
Barista: "Coffee?"
Me: "No, Gatorade."

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The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy has hired Maury Povich as its spokesperson. I can't make that up.

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Last week, a few miles from where I live, a car carrying several people shot and killed someone, then led police in a wild chase that ended in downtown Berkeley - on the corner where I buy my flaxseed at Berkeley Bowl - when they crashed into another car, seriously injuring its driver, and then crashed onto the sidewalk, running over and killing a pedestrian. Two of the occupants of the bad guy car are pictured above, as is the pedestrian who was killed. Can you figure out who is who? I'll leave you hanging.

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In Texas they have a problem with ants. Researchers have figured out an incredible way to combat the problem. They're using a tiny phorid fly, native to South America, that lays eggs on the ants, then the eggs hatch into maggots inside the ant, and then the maggots eat the brains of the ants, turning them into zombies. It's all true: the ant will survive about two weeks, walking aimlessly as its brain is slowly eaten and then even survive a little longer without its brain, because ants are like that: they're game, they go the extra mile, they take one for the team.
After a few painful, mind-numbing weeks of getting its brain eaten, the ants head eventually falls off and a fly emerges from the skull, ready to lay more eggs on more ants. This is brilliant. God got it right, again. He does that sometimes. Bravo!

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Miss California, Carrie Prejean, was just one question short of being crowned Miss American and representing the US in the Miss Universe pageant. She stumbled on the question, "Should same sex marriage be allowed in the US," to which she replied, "No. In my country, marriage is something to be shared between a man and a woman." Oops. A few days later it was revealed that her breasts were paid for by the pageant itself, and that she'd posed semi-nude for pictures in the past. Double-D Ooops. She initially responded to the picture controversy by saying they were photoshopped. She has probably since back-peddled on that but I'm not certain. She shouldn't have even gone there. Photoshopped? What does that mean, 'to be photoshopped' -I hear that all the time. "It was photoshopped." "That's photoshopped." "I was photoshopped." What are people talking about when they say something has been photoshopped? Does that mean that someone can just come along and turn princess Carrie into a Playboy Model? (you were photoshopped) It's clear from her answer at the pageant that she's a raging, cocksucking heterosexual, but is she a slut too? (you were photoshopped) Does she plan on being a spokesmodel to defend Proposition 8? (you were photoshopped) Or is she just like 10% of the other women in the US, a muff-diving dyke? (you were photoshopped)

don't blame migrogers and try to sue my ass, cuz it was all Kago's idea.

Let it Load

The files that appear below are usually in the 60-70mb range in size. If you want to view the file, I'd recommend clicking the link, then wait a couple minutes to let the video load into your browser before hitting the play button. These are progressive downloads, and if your connection is at all slow, or if the server is slow on my side, the video will begin to play and then halt. So you may need to be patient. Enjoy!